The February Review
February was filled with both high and low moments, which is a natural representation of the human experience. Prior to arriving in Boston, I had been warned by family and friends about the brutal winters in the city, and they were not exaggerating. On February 4th, 2023, the entire East Coast experienced severe weather conditions, with a record low temperature of -10 degrees Fahrenheit (-23 degrees Celsius for my international friends). I vividly remember that day, as I had to walk to work wearing nearly six layers of clothing, yet still feeling the biting wind chills in my bones. It was only then that I realized anything below 0 degrees Fahrenheit is considered dangerously cold, and I had foolishly exposed myself to such weather. However, some areas near Boston had it even worse than I could ever imagine. Mount Washington in New Hampshire recorded a bone-chilling low of -108 degrees Fahrenheit, including the wind chill. Considering my struggles with -23 degrees Celsius, I couldn’t fathom just how freakishly cold that must have been. Needless to say, this experience served as a stark reminder of the truly harsh and brutal winters in New England.
BREAKING 🚨: Mount Washington observatory in New Hampshire just recorded its coldest ever windchill of -104 F (-76 C) https://t.co/1nNbkefC3L pic.twitter.com/gcNLJoJ0Gn
— Michael Rose (@mmistakes) February 4, 2023
In addition to the brutal winters, the transition to adulthood has presented me with a few challenges. At just 21 years old, I began experiencing a peculiar disconnect between my professional self and my true self. From a professional standpoint, it feels like I’ve fast-forwarded through life and am being treated as if I’m much older than I actually am. This becomes particularly evident in the workplace, where I consistently interact with individuals who have over 10 years of experience on me. While being surrounded by older colleagues can have its advantages, it also creates a noticeable gap between myself and those around me. Our priorities at our respective stages of life are significantly different. When my peers ask me about my weekend, it feels somewhat foreign to share the truth, as I may have been busy enjoying nightlife while they were focused on taking care of their young children. Another aspect I quickly picked up on was the need to justify my decisions during group meetings. Instead of simply providing progress updates, these meetings sometimes felt more like defending a Ph.D. thesis. These factors combined to create an interesting dynamic in the workplace, but this is just one side of the story.
On the other hand, I was just a 21-year-old navigating adulthood on my own. While I had become accustomed to the logistical aspects of adulthood such as managing my own chores, paying rent, and making responsible decisions, there was still so much more for which I was unprepared. One of the biggest changes I experienced since transitioning from academia to the industry was the 9-5 schedule. The traditional 9-5 meant having a regular 8-hour workday, but it also meant having an abundance of free time outside those hours. And the concept of free time was foreign to me. For so long, I had been consumed by completing homework, attending club meetings, networking, and engaging in social activities. But suddenly, none of that seemed to exist anymore. So, to sit and do nothing sometimes felt almost wrong. I had always maintained a schedule filled with activities and obligations, and now, for the first time, I had free time but no idea how to utilize it. At 21, I imagined myself still in the midst of college, making foolish decisions, and enjoying the carefree years of my early twenties. But my life felt so different from that. It felt real and legitimate, and I wasn’t sure if I fully resonated with how everything was unfolding.
As a result, this month, I experienced a series of spirals that took a toll on my mental health. The cold and gloomy days in February left me feeling lost, unsure of which direction to turn when I needed guidance. Perhaps seeking help from my older co-workers would be seen as a sign of immaturity and weakness. On the other hand, explaining my situation to my friends at university wouldn’t be very beneficial since they had no understanding of this side of adulthood. There were moments when I felt stuck and possibly regretful about leaving college early, but there were also plenty of benefits that came with this month. Overall, the message I’m trying to convey is that the transition to adulthood is never as easy as it may seem. Moving from being a carefree college student to a full-fledged professional isn’t a straightforward journey, and the multifaceted nature of adulthood only adds to its complexities. There are certainly things I wish I had known before growing up so quickly, but I also believe that’s what makes life exciting. Unraveling and navigating life as it unfolds presents its own set of challenges, but for me, it continues to shape my open-minded and reflective mindset, adding character to my personal growth.
Top Three Highlights of the Month
1. Getting an offer into a Ph.D. Program
The first highlight of the month was part of a long-term initiative that began back in November when I reached out to my former principal investigator (PI), Jeffrey Chiang, about the possibility of pursuing a Ph.D. After a series of email exchanges with him, he instilled in me the confidence to give it another try. The process of applying to graduate programs is generally arduous, and I’m not entirely sure what criteria are required for acceptance into these programs. However, having Jeff as a connection within the department I was applying to felt like a potential advantage. Several months later, in late February, I received an email informing me that I had been admitted into the Computational Medicine Ph.D. program at UCLA, which happened to be the only program I applied to. The somewhat amusing but true reason behind this decision was that it was the only school that granted me a fee waiver for the application. I had initially considered applying to UCSF as well, but ultimately didn’t submit my application by the deadline. Regardless, I was ecstatic to be accepted, and I wanted to share my experience from my point of view.
One of my goals or New Year’s resolutions for the start of the year was to become a better writer. However, this desire to improve as a writer started long before the new year. It was the driving force behind the creation of this initial iteration of the blog (which has mostly been archived…). There was something about storytelling that seemed like a highly practical skill in the real world, so I sought ways to enhance my storytelling abilities. I read books, watched movies, played video games—anything that could provide insight into the intricacies of storytelling. The reason behind this particular focus on improving my writing was because a former PI had once informed me that my writing lacked clarity. It was constructive criticism, but it stung. However, I have always been the type of person who, when told I can’t do something, is motivated to prove others wrong. In a way, I took that moment personally and was determined to show my former PI that I could improve. After investing a significant amount of time in learning the essence of storytelling, it was time to put my newly acquired and hopefully improved writing skills to the test. For those who have applied to graduate programs, you may be aware of how daunting it is to showcase all your accomplishments and make a clear point within a finite word limit. Although I won’t share the content of my essays on this blog (feel free to contact me individually for a copy of my statements), I do want to share the objectives I aimed for when writing these statements. Graduate school is notoriously demanding, so I wanted to demonstrate a time when I faced a challenge but showed resilience and personal growth. Additionally, I wrote a traditional research statement outlining my previous experience. I remember rereading these statements hundreds of times, with my former PI’s words lingering in the back of my mind. However, at some point, rereading the same thing over and over became impractical, and I ended up submitting my application a few days before the deadline.
Typically, after the statements are reviewed by the department, the first-round candidates are asked to conduct interviews with numerous faculty members. I remember hearing back relatively quickly from the school, which made my heart skip a beat, knowing that my statements were good enough for a first pass. Based on what I’ve read on Grad Cafe and Reddit, interviews usually involved an exclusive group of around 20 students. However, on the day of the interview, I was astonished to see that there were nearly 80 candidates on the Zoom call. This was obviously a blow to my confidence, but it also affected everyone’s confidence, knowing that a majority of candidates made it to the second round. Nonetheless, at this stage, the mindset was to control what I could and present myself as someone who naturally fit into the program. On a personal level, it was challenging because I noticed two other students from the same program I had been in. It drew a line between friendship and competition, but once again, I could only control what was within my power.
Another interesting aspect of these interviews was that we got to choose who interviewed us. The department asked us to select four professors whom we would be interested in speaking with. Naturally, I picked my former PI Jeff, along with Dr. Bruna Balliu, and I was assigned Dr. Jessica Li and Dr. Tom Chou to complete my list of interviewers. For the most part, my interviews went well, but there were also times when I stumbled. However, I believe that two things ultimately contributed to my acceptance into the program. Firstly, during one of the interviews, I mentioned the words “AI/ML methods development”, which aligned with the program’s overarching theme. The department places a strong focus on developing new methods, and by emphasizing those specific words, I believe it helped establish a promising match between the program and myself.
The second reason I believe I was accepted is because I had the opportunity to meet one of the professors and give a presentation while she was on sabbatical at Harvard University. Since I was in Boston, Professor Jessica Li expressed interest in hearing more about my work, which led to a longer in-person presentation. She invited me to the Radcliffe Institute to give a mini-seminar about some of my previous and current research. This was both a daunting and exciting moment in my life, as it extended the interview process and gave me the chance to present at Harvard University. During the seminar, I faced a barrage of questions from Professor Li and her students, and while I did my best to answer them to the best of my knowledge, I had mixed feelings about the overall experience. After discussing my academic journey with Professor Li, she told me to “try again next year” if it didn’t work out. I interpreted those words as a sign that my admission was a longshot. However, a few hours later, I received an offer of acceptance. Professor Jessica Li is a distinguished professor in the department, and the coincidence of being accepted shortly after giving this talk was remarkable. Although I will never truly know the exact reasons for my acceptance, these two moments I believe contributed to it. While this experience was unique to myself, I thought it was worth mentioning nonetheless. So, some general advice for prospective graduate students is to become both great presenters and storytellers, as these two components are critical throughout the graduate process.
2. Starting an Excercise Routine
The second highlight of the month was starting a gym routine. While this may not seem as significant as previous highlights, there were two reasons why it was noteworthy. The first reason was that the weather in Boston during February was unbearably cold, making it difficult to enjoy outdoor activities. The second reason was that many of my friends had previously tried to convince me to commit to going to the gym, but I had always declined. However, given my mental state at the time, I decided to give it a try.
One of my friends, Mikey, who attends MIT, is into powerlifting and Judo. During February, I spent a significant amount of time hanging out with Mikey, his girlfriend Soo, and their friends at MIT. Being around them frequently, I became familiar with their daily routine, which included spending a long time at the gym almost every day. Consequently, our hangouts would usually start around 9 pm, which I would consider late. However, since they were my closest social circle at the time, I adjusted my schedule accordingly. One day, when I was at their place, they asked me why I didn’t want to go to the gym with them, and I couldn’t come up with a valid reason. I had consistently rejected offers from my friends to join them and train, and I didn’t see this as any different. However, they explained several benefits of weightlifting, such as visible progress, a positive body image, and increased physical strength. Intrigued by these reasons, I decided to give working out a try.
My first workout with Mikey was incredibly challenging, as he pushed me to physical exhaustion. Gym enthusiasts tend to spend hours training, often up to 2.5-3 hours, and my experience was no different. We focused on back and biceps exercises, targeting areas of my body that I didn’t even know could be trained. Consequently, the next morning I woke up feeling extremely sore from the intense workout. Embracing a powerlifter’s routine was no joke, but it was just the beginning of my fitness journey. In addition to weightlifting, I also started paying attention to my diet. Fortunately, our office provided an abundance of free snacks, so I found myself consuming a substantial amount of Cliff Protein Bars (7+ bars per week). Like many endeavors, weightlifting required consistent effort to see progress. For a long time, I had lacked commitment to any form of physical activity, but this experience showed me that it was never too late to adopt a new hobby. As time went on, I began to notice minimal changes, which is exactly what I aimed for. Alongside strength exercises, I also committed to completing my Apple Watch rings every day, which included 8 standing hours, 30 minutes of exercise, and burning 300 calories. While these fitness goals may have seemed relatively modest, they provided me with the gentle push I needed on those cold days when all I wanted to do was stay indoors. So, even though everything wasn’t perfect during this month, I was pleased to see myself becoming active once again.
3. Eugene Visits Boston
The final highlight of February was the opportunity to give my brother a grand tour of Boston. Despite being only my second month in the city, I felt a strong sense of belonging and an obligation to showcase all the wonderful aspects of my new home. And since this is a blog, why not bring you, the reader, along for the ride as well? So, buckle up and let’s embark on a virtual tour of Boston!
We kicked off our adventure by heading to the vibrant neighborhood of Seaport. This area is a hotbed of development, boasting modern architecture, a picturesque waterfront location, and a thriving cultural scene. As we strolled along, we were captivated by the upscale restaurants, trendy shops, and the breathtaking views of the harbor. It’s no wonder that Seaport has become a beloved spot for both locals and tourists, offering the perfect fusion of cosmopolitan living and coastal charm.
Since Boston is renowned for its seafood, I couldn’t resist taking my brother to an oyster bar to indulge in some of the city’s delectable maritime delights. We raised our glasses in a toast and savored the exquisite flavors of freshly shucked oysters, rich New England clam chowder, succulent mussels, and a hearty bowl of cioppino. As we feasted, we caught up on all the stories and moments we had missed out on since our last meeting, cherishing this precious time together.
On the second day of our adventure, we set out to explore the vibrant city of Cambridge, situated just across the majestic Charles River from Boston. Cambridge is renowned for its prestigious educational institutions like Harvard University and the Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT). It’s a place brimming with intellectual prowess, cultural vibrancy, and an eclectic mix of residents. The neighborhood exudes a captivating charm with its historic architecture, delightful neighborhoods, and a plethora of dining options that tantalize the taste buds. As we strolled along the Charles River, I couldn’t help but marvel at the breathtaking campuses of MIT and Harvard, their grandeur making us feel like we were part of something truly extraordinary.
After walking along the Charles we decided to go grab some food. But the cost of living in Boston can sometimes be such a nuisance. Luckily, our adventurous spirits led us to stumble upon a hidden gem in Harvard Square—a place where budget-friendly food awaited us. We found ourselves slurping bowls of ramen at a steal of a price, savoring every delectable bite. It was an insider tip I mentally bookmarked for future reference, a secret weapon to combat any hunger pangs without breaking the bank.
On our final day, we immersed ourselves in the heart and soul of Boston itself. This captivating metropolis, the capital city of Massachusetts, seamlessly weaves together a rich tapestry of American history & culture. Our itinerary took us to remarkable spots like North Station, where the Boston Celtics play their thrilling basketball games. My brother, still basking in the glory of the Golden State Warriors’ triumph over the Celtics in the previous NBA season, couldn’t resist some playful teasing and trolling at the venue. We also explored the vibrant Quincy Market, a food lover’s paradise with an abundance of culinary delights to satisfy any craving. And of course, we couldn’t miss strolling through Boston Common, a park reminiscent of New York’s Central Park, albeit with its own unique charm.
Although our time together was short, I was elated to share a slice of Boston’s charm with my brother. It was a journey filled with laughter, discovery, and I was glad I could show him a piece of my city.
One thing I learned this Month
Making friends as an adult is hard
February, as mentioned earlier, proved to be a socially challenging month. The abundance of alone time made me realize the value of the college experience and how unique it truly was. However, my own college journey was significantly impacted by the pandemic, making it difficult to fully grasp that sense of camaraderie. During my brief stint in Boston, I quickly discovered the complexities of making friends as an adult. It almost seemed paradoxical considering the city’s vibrant youthfulness and intellectual atmosphere. Yet, even as a young adult, forging meaningful connections proved to be a challenge.
One of the main obstacles was the stark division between work and school. While I could immerse myself in a scholastic setting, the same could not be said for students attempting to comprehend the demands of the working world. I empathize with the trials and tribulations of being a student, but it’s challenging for them to truly grasp the intricacies of adult responsibilities. Furthermore, the highly driven nature of Boston students added another layer of difficulty. I used to believe I was pushing my limits by juggling multiple part-time jobs, engaging in research, and enjoying a vibrant social life. However, it seemed that everyone in Boston was operating on an even more intense schedule, leaving little time for socializing. I encountered situations where I attempted to go on dates with girls from MIT, but their overwhelming academic workload limited our time together to a mere two hours, if that. Consequently, I found myself relying heavily on dating apps as my primary social outlet. Without platforms like Hinge or Tinder, I honestly don’t know how I would have any friends at all.
Yet, going on dates always entails a level of uncertainty. You never know who you’ll meet or if your personalities will align. The constant process of reintroducing myself and trying to convey my true self became mentally draining. In the end, this month taught me just how challenging it can be to form genuine friendships. As social as I am, the amount of effort I exerted in my attempts to connect with others left me feeling exhausted, sometimes preferring to just be alone in my own thoughts. Adulthood presents numerous challenges, and I now understand why people fall in love… Its so then they will have somehting to do when they get home…
Quote of the Month
“A bend in the road is not the end of the road…”
Hoping for a better month in March!
Contact
Simon Lee
simonlee711@gmail.com